Asshole Of The Day -- This Gypsy Bus Driver

So the ride in this morning is ripe with assholes but the minute I walked on to the bus it started! I parked my car, grabbed my things and before I knew one of the little busses (not a short bus) was turning he corner on blvd east. He stops and picks up three other guys and me.  I allow them to I first because they have been waiting longer.  Now these bus drivers are usually hit or miss and very competitive with other guys who drive these little buses.  I've seen full blown arguments where two buses blocked the road to get their point across with complete disregard to other drivers; it's crazy.

Anyway,  As I'm walk on to the bus, the guy closes the door as I'm walking in and starts driving. The only problem is my right leg is on the first step and my left leg was still in the air and now stuck in the door!  I can laugh now but I'm not going to lie I definitely panicked and shouted then showed him the problem to which he opened the door and then just kept on like it was nothing.

Listen, I get the fact that because I try my hardest not to ride NJ transit buses like my father always encouraged me to for the mere fact that is anything happened "that's who has insurance, that I have to deal with whatever happens.  I admit most of the times they are funny, especially when you're a spectator at funny events but not when you're the event.  If all else I can chalk it up to the guy in such a rush to get everyone to work on time, but what does it matter to me, I'm already late plus that was my running leg-

Cheers to this asshole!
L

Asshole(s) of the Day: Ugly-Hearted Lunchers

Today's Asshole(s) of the day wasn't funny at all; These girls are the epitome of assholes.

I went to meet a friend for lunch today in the city with a good friend and after leaving a dodgy place with high ratings, we ended up at Havana Central.  We were sat immediately and ordered our drinks then our  food and shot the shit for awhile.

I want to point out from the get go that I notice everything and hear everything usually within a 10-12 foot radial around me at all times.  It's nothing special, but I think people are too busy or consumed to be cognizant these days.

While they were serving us, they sat these classy ladies next to us.  To get into her seat the Latin girl said, excuse me, and took her seat.  Her friend followed. As they did, my friend was telling me about a girl he had just gone on a date with, the girl in the forefront looked over, which caught my attention from the corner of my eye.  She leaned over to her friend and said, "This guy's talking about a girl he went on a date with."  Her friend replied, "I'm sure there wasn't a second one."  

I heard it and immediately I wanted to say something; even though my friend didn't hear, I was STEWING.  I sat quietly and calmly still talking with my friend but I quickly began to think about how I would let them know they suck.  One for walking into our conversation and then passing judgement.  Then I thought, "better yet I'll ask to take their picture before we go and when they ask why, I'd tell them that I have a blog called Asshole of the Day."   By the time I'm done eating though, I would have been so over it.  So I put my fork down and picked up my camera.  I pointed it in their direction while I was waiting for the camera app to open.  I purposefully did so hoping they would notice.  And then I took a picture with the flash on.

I continued my conversation and was never asked.

Look, I'm all about funny jokes or conversations at the expense of someone you see be it what they are wearing or something they do or say, please we ALL do it.  It could be a chuckle or a flat out laugh but never so flat out mean or rude.  And that's the rule; no one gets hurt.  If anyone hears, you failed.

Asshole of the Day: The "Look at Me!" Asshole

OK,  This isn't my asshole; my friend Tony sent this to me so he gets credit where credit is due.
Alright so look at this asshole, lol.  You seem to see them everywhere you go, usually at sporting or entertainment event:

When did she ever wear this?

The "look at me," asshole.

We'd all like some attention right? But there's a right and wrong way to do it.  This guy, in my opinion did it wrong.  Those shoes could have been a couple of inches shorter maybe, or he could have gone for the smiling "I'm nice and funny approach,"  but he decided to go with, "I'm the best fan, and I'm better than you approach."

When would this ever go right?!?  Especially in front of hundreds of people who are just WAITING for you to fall, cause that's human nature.  Not to mention his friend, who now has to lug him around clutched to her hand with his kung-fu grip.  Like, what if there's a fire?  Or you have to run to the front row?  Not cool.  Anyhow, thank this guy for a nice laugh.

The fun starts at :42

Asshole of the day - The "everyone should know what I'm going through" lady

I sat down in the back of the gypsy bus that takes me into the city for work.  I had my choice of prime seating, however I was carrying two bags and my coat in my hands (thanks to this sudden heatwave that is tearing through the metropolitan area..)  I sit all the way in the back where there is a row of 6 seats altogether. I am the only one back there so far.  My chair is cave-like, almost as if I am sinking into it.  I play my tunes, not paying attention to anything on the bus.

In the seconds between a song ending and another one starting, I hear a brief "Hello!" and think nothing of it.  The lady in the seat in front and to the left has picked up her phone.  As we get closer to the bridge the man with the ginger-red pony tail has turned to look at this lady at least 4 times.  At this point, I catch another small piece of her conversation:

"I don't do anything!  I stay home and I don't see anybody!"

A young guy gets on the bus and chooses to sit in the back only after I move my coat and my bag that are monopolizing two other seats.  I grab my stuff and he sits and when he does, I explain to him that "Sorry, I'm just feel like I'm getting sucked into this..."  The man with the ginger-red pony tail turns and laughs, The lady on the phone turns and stares.  Apparently, the man with the ginger-red pony-tail has been listening to all sorts of crazy that I have missed and he thought I was too.  What I meant to imply was that I felt like I was getting sucked into my chair, but at this point nothing else matters, cause I just realized the lady on the phone was a substitute science teacher at Public School No. 1 and Memorial High School!

Look at the anger in her right hand.

For those of you who didn't go to our school here is a woman that would tell us about science having found Komodo Dragons the size of real mythical dragons on an island somewhere.  The same lady that also told us that when Edison patented the Telephone, Elisha Grey, had patented the same invention an hour before (she was right about that one).  Also, the same woman that Mrs. Tarr, dubbed the wickedest science teacher in Memorial, bluntly said, "Don't listen to anything that comes out of that woman's mouth."

So hear she is after all these years on my bus and I'm listening to everything coming out of her mouth.  It turns out, All of her colleagues still make fun of her and her dad is going through Alzheimer's.  I'm sad about both things cause I always thought she was outside of the box, but come on sister, keep it to yourself.

So there I was literally standing up trying to get a picture of her so I can post, but the bus was still moving and there were people trying to get off.  While I'm standing right across from her, she does that thing people do when they see someone they know and the other person is pretending not to see them.  It's not that I didn't want to talk to her, I just didn't care to do it, after she had everyone on the bus judging her (I still have subconscious catholic guilt at times).  I can see her through my 20/20 peripheral sitting up as if trying to get my attention.  So instead continuing to record the conversation with my phone, I figured I should be happy with the pictures and move on.

Cheers to her!  For being the first (recorded incident) asshole of the day.