Asshole Of The Day -- This Gypsy Bus Driver

So the ride in this morning is ripe with assholes but the minute I walked on to the bus it started! I parked my car, grabbed my things and before I knew one of the little busses (not a short bus) was turning he corner on blvd east. He stops and picks up three other guys and me.  I allow them to I first because they have been waiting longer.  Now these bus drivers are usually hit or miss and very competitive with other guys who drive these little buses.  I've seen full blown arguments where two buses blocked the road to get their point across with complete disregard to other drivers; it's crazy.

Anyway,  As I'm walk on to the bus, the guy closes the door as I'm walking in and starts driving. The only problem is my right leg is on the first step and my left leg was still in the air and now stuck in the door!  I can laugh now but I'm not going to lie I definitely panicked and shouted then showed him the problem to which he opened the door and then just kept on like it was nothing.

Listen, I get the fact that because I try my hardest not to ride NJ transit buses like my father always encouraged me to for the mere fact that is anything happened "that's who has insurance, that I have to deal with whatever happens.  I admit most of the times they are funny, especially when you're a spectator at funny events but not when you're the event.  If all else I can chalk it up to the guy in such a rush to get everyone to work on time, but what does it matter to me, I'm already late plus that was my running leg-

Cheers to this asshole!
L

Asshole(s) of the Day: Ugly-Hearted Lunchers

Today's Asshole(s) of the day wasn't funny at all; These girls are the epitome of assholes.

I went to meet a friend for lunch today in the city with a good friend and after leaving a dodgy place with high ratings, we ended up at Havana Central.  We were sat immediately and ordered our drinks then our  food and shot the shit for awhile.

I want to point out from the get go that I notice everything and hear everything usually within a 10-12 foot radial around me at all times.  It's nothing special, but I think people are too busy or consumed to be cognizant these days.

While they were serving us, they sat these classy ladies next to us.  To get into her seat the Latin girl said, excuse me, and took her seat.  Her friend followed. As they did, my friend was telling me about a girl he had just gone on a date with, the girl in the forefront looked over, which caught my attention from the corner of my eye.  She leaned over to her friend and said, "This guy's talking about a girl he went on a date with."  Her friend replied, "I'm sure there wasn't a second one."  

I heard it and immediately I wanted to say something; even though my friend didn't hear, I was STEWING.  I sat quietly and calmly still talking with my friend but I quickly began to think about how I would let them know they suck.  One for walking into our conversation and then passing judgement.  Then I thought, "better yet I'll ask to take their picture before we go and when they ask why, I'd tell them that I have a blog called Asshole of the Day."   By the time I'm done eating though, I would have been so over it.  So I put my fork down and picked up my camera.  I pointed it in their direction while I was waiting for the camera app to open.  I purposefully did so hoping they would notice.  And then I took a picture with the flash on.

I continued my conversation and was never asked.

Look, I'm all about funny jokes or conversations at the expense of someone you see be it what they are wearing or something they do or say, please we ALL do it.  It could be a chuckle or a flat out laugh but never so flat out mean or rude.  And that's the rule; no one gets hurt.  If anyone hears, you failed.

Asshole of the Day: The "Look at Me!" Asshole

OK,  This isn't my asshole; my friend Tony sent this to me so he gets credit where credit is due.
Alright so look at this asshole, lol.  You seem to see them everywhere you go, usually at sporting or entertainment event:

When did she ever wear this?

The "look at me," asshole.

We'd all like some attention right? But there's a right and wrong way to do it.  This guy, in my opinion did it wrong.  Those shoes could have been a couple of inches shorter maybe, or he could have gone for the smiling "I'm nice and funny approach,"  but he decided to go with, "I'm the best fan, and I'm better than you approach."

When would this ever go right?!?  Especially in front of hundreds of people who are just WAITING for you to fall, cause that's human nature.  Not to mention his friend, who now has to lug him around clutched to her hand with his kung-fu grip.  Like, what if there's a fire?  Or you have to run to the front row?  Not cool.  Anyhow, thank this guy for a nice laugh.

The fun starts at :42

Asshole of the day - The "everyone should know what I'm going through" lady

I sat down in the back of the gypsy bus that takes me into the city for work.  I had my choice of prime seating, however I was carrying two bags and my coat in my hands (thanks to this sudden heatwave that is tearing through the metropolitan area..)  I sit all the way in the back where there is a row of 6 seats altogether. I am the only one back there so far.  My chair is cave-like, almost as if I am sinking into it.  I play my tunes, not paying attention to anything on the bus.

In the seconds between a song ending and another one starting, I hear a brief "Hello!" and think nothing of it.  The lady in the seat in front and to the left has picked up her phone.  As we get closer to the bridge the man with the ginger-red pony tail has turned to look at this lady at least 4 times.  At this point, I catch another small piece of her conversation:

"I don't do anything!  I stay home and I don't see anybody!"

A young guy gets on the bus and chooses to sit in the back only after I move my coat and my bag that are monopolizing two other seats.  I grab my stuff and he sits and when he does, I explain to him that "Sorry, I'm just feel like I'm getting sucked into this..."  The man with the ginger-red pony tail turns and laughs, The lady on the phone turns and stares.  Apparently, the man with the ginger-red pony-tail has been listening to all sorts of crazy that I have missed and he thought I was too.  What I meant to imply was that I felt like I was getting sucked into my chair, but at this point nothing else matters, cause I just realized the lady on the phone was a substitute science teacher at Public School No. 1 and Memorial High School!

Look at the anger in her right hand.

For those of you who didn't go to our school here is a woman that would tell us about science having found Komodo Dragons the size of real mythical dragons on an island somewhere.  The same lady that also told us that when Edison patented the Telephone, Elisha Grey, had patented the same invention an hour before (she was right about that one).  Also, the same woman that Mrs. Tarr, dubbed the wickedest science teacher in Memorial, bluntly said, "Don't listen to anything that comes out of that woman's mouth."

So hear she is after all these years on my bus and I'm listening to everything coming out of her mouth.  It turns out, All of her colleagues still make fun of her and her dad is going through Alzheimer's.  I'm sad about both things cause I always thought she was outside of the box, but come on sister, keep it to yourself.

So there I was literally standing up trying to get a picture of her so I can post, but the bus was still moving and there were people trying to get off.  While I'm standing right across from her, she does that thing people do when they see someone they know and the other person is pretending not to see them.  It's not that I didn't want to talk to her, I just didn't care to do it, after she had everyone on the bus judging her (I still have subconscious catholic guilt at times).  I can see her through my 20/20 peripheral sitting up as if trying to get my attention.  So instead continuing to record the conversation with my phone, I figured I should be happy with the pictures and move on.

Cheers to her!  For being the first (recorded incident) asshole of the day.

It's been a while....lol It's almost as if assholes took a break while I was enlightening myself. But not for too long.

Well first night out with my roommates and sure enough an asshole emerged; ripe with hemorrhoids and all other fun stuff assholes can be.  This one was a bartender at Flaming Saddles (funny name) in NYC. the first sign of asshole-dom was When foursquare said of we checked in, they would give us a free beer. Chris walked up to one bartender and got a free drink asap, I walked up to another bartender, the asshole of the day.  I showed him my phone so I can get my free beer and he says, "you have to show me the actual coupon!"  I was like "um ok, let's figure this out..." It was literally a click away from a free drink, so I showed him the next screen and he gestured "ok."  Fine whatever.

Then after a couple of drinks I wanted to check out the juke box.  This place plays mostly country western, so I searched my memory whatever I knew country westen and along the way I found Tina Turner's rendition of Proud Mary.  I played it.  Once it came on, this asshole says, "What you don't like Country music???"  To which I replied, "I didn't request this,"  I did, however now after being called out in front of the bar I felt like a dick.  Then I thought twice and said, "Are you stereo-typing me?"  which I said as a joke.  He replies, "Are you black?"  DONE.  He would later go on to say that he was joking but his eyes were not those of a joker; a clown maybe, but he was not being genuine.  In my eyes the conversation is over.  He skips my song and goes on to the next song which coincidentally was mine as well.

I go downstairs to the bathroom and when I come back my friends have gone to the bar to get another drink.  When they get back, Peter is shaking his head and tells me about how this douche bag followed him to the other side of the bar to fill their drink order when they in fact walked to the other side of the bar to avoid him.  Then my friend calls him a bitch to the other bartender.  This asshole quickly rushes back and says, "What did you call me?!?"  Oh my gosh enough, what a tired old joke this had become.

Eventually he gets to talking to our one roommate Chris and begins to tell him how we ruined his night, when he was the one that invited conflict.  So Peter walks up and gets in on the conversation and begins to explain the things he did that were applicable to him being an asshole and the whole time this guy is blaming it on us.  We just went out for a good time.  It's not our fault this guy is jaded and bitter.  I've worked in the serving industry for a long time when I was younger.  If you don't like people don't work at a bar, if you don't like your job and its all you're qualified to do, get a life, go back to school and do something else.  Don't plague places with your existence when other people are trying to have fun.

I never caught his name but here he his:

If you know him, I'm sorry.  But if you know him, tag him to this pic and marginalize him.

Asshole of the Day - Hall of Assholes Inductee Rick Perry

I've been gone for awhile1 BUT, I do have a couple of assholes saved on my phone and a couple of videos.  I just have not have not had the time.

HOWEVER, I did see this video of Rick Perry and it was more than enough to have our first (of many) Inductees to the Assholes.  That's right, he is an absolute permanent fixture after watching this you will understand why.



He, his campaign and their message is ripe with hypocrisy, hate, lack of historical facts about just utter lack of theology.  Faith did not make America strong; in fact the only thing that faith did was ship the first settlers and separatists to the new world to escape religious persecution.  Faith made America and rational thinking people victim to an ungodly message.

What is so damn wrong with gays serving openly in the military?  Still?  People who have a problem with gay and lesbian people serving in our military should enlist and then try to explain to me why it would matter.  Would it matter when and if your platoon came under attack the person who may have saved your life was a gay soldier?  I'm sure if Rick Perry's son or daughter were to even join the service, he be singing a different tune.    The statement he made in this video is so asinine and when we look back years to come, we're going to think, "What the hell we're we thinking," just like we do about the Civil Rights movements of the 60's.  What a ridiculous and archaic thing to say.

Also Mr. Perry, the forefathers who were believers in separation of the church and the state.  Rick Perry is just so wrong but I'm sure he is pandering to religious voters who vote in record numbers.

He shouldn't be ashamed of being a christian; he should be ashamed of distorting religious rhetoric further than the bible has distorted any divine messages.

Asshole of the Day - The 50 dollar Incident

O gosh, there are a plethora of assholes in this situation; you decide who was right and who was wrong.

So after celebrating Halloween in the city and getting home at the early hour of the morning, my friend and I took a small bus that is usually parked on the side of the Port Authority.  It was the first time my friend had taken one of these buses and in my state I forgot that these buses are hotbeds for assholes especially drunk assholes and better yet, drunk assholes in costumes!

As we got on the bus, I paid for us with a 20 dollar bill, the bus driver gave me a 50 dollar bill in change and was going to give me more.  "I gave you a 20,"  I quickly told him; to which I recall him saying something like "I'm giving you change!"  Then I showed him the 50 dollar bill in my hand.  "Thanks, thanks a lot," he said under his breath.

We took our seats and began to talk, briefly about the fact that I could have kept my mouth shut and taken the money, but karma made me do it, I don't want that evil on me...  While we were talking about that this happened:

hahaha.  OK she was asshole, I don't agree with how she went about it and she should have counted her money better.

But this man needs to learn how to count, lol.  I think he ended up giving her money back.